Florida Man Fends-Off ‘Vampire’ by Dancing on Cop Car

surveillance video of the supposed vampire attack (Lee County Sheriff's Office)

Surveillance video of the supposed vampire attack (Lee County Sheriff’s Office)

Florida Man Fends-Off ‘Vampire’ by Dancing on Cop Car

A Florida man has been arrested for dancing on top of a marked patrol car for what he claims was an act to protect his children from a vampire. Yes, a vampire. 44-year-old Christian Radecki of Cape Coral, Florida, was caught on surveillance video bumping his car into the back of a Lee County sheriff’s vehicle and then hopping on top of the roof to do a jig while music blasted from his car. As he strangely slow jammed on top of the officer’s car, his soundtrack was Hall & Oates’ “Rich Girl” and Supertramp’s “Goodbye Stranger,” which may be the bigger crimes.

For an encore, the man broke off the windshield wipers of the trooper vessel and stole the American flag from the neighbor’s yard before being chased down by police and forced to do the perp walk of shame while a song from the Grease soundtrack played.

According to the official police report, Radecki said he was responding to a “woman with fangs” coming to his door and threatening that a human sacrifice was about to occur involving a vampire.  Radecki reportedly made the decision to get the “Sheriff of Nottingham” to assist him in summoning help to stop the “slaughter of small children.”

Weird Florida

Florida is infamous for bizarre stories featuring outlandish behavior by its residents. Floridians have already been stalked by the Skunk Ape and attacked by alleged zombies. Let’s hope that a blood-sucking vampire isn’t the latest mythological miscreant to attack the inhabitants of the troubled tropical peninsula, though fabled logic would indicate that a vampire would avoid at all costs a place nicknamed “The Sunshine State.

Not Inebriated?

Radecki told officers that he had not consumed any alcohol or taken any recreational drugs. He also declared that he has not been diagnosed with any mental health disorders. Despite this proclamation, all of these possibilities will surely be looked into further.

After the dusk was settled, Radecki was arrested for Disturbing the Peace and Criminal Mischief. He was then taken to Cape Coral Hospital for medical clearance and subsequently transferred to the Lee County Justice Center.

You can follow the further adventures of Florida Man on Twitter: @_FloridaMan, an account that tweets links to weird stories that begin their headlines with “Florida Man…”. The Florida Man bio reads, “Real-life stories of the world’s worst superhero.

View the shenanigans in the YouTube video below.
Caution: this may be the most hilarious video you’ve ever seen.

What do you think of this Florida Man’s actions? Do you think that he might have found an alleged vampire? Was he selling the authorities a bill of goods in order to avoid prosecution? Share your comments below and join the conversation on Twitter using #DMtalk.

If you still crave more Oddball Florida, take a look at:  A Guide to Some Really Strange Places ~sls

Editor’s Note: The ideas expressed are those of the author, based on evidence cited from independent sources, and not necessarily that of Dark Matter News, Dark Matter Digital Networks, Art Bell or Midnight in the Desert.

Staff Writer

Leo Ashcraft

A retired broadcast engineer, talk show host, news reporter - I have done everything there is to do in the radio broadcast business. I worked a year in television. I left that as my true passion has always been radio - plus I got tired of hearing - you have a face for radio.. I hope you enjoy my articles! Be sure to share them excessively on facebook - like our page and bug your friends with invites!

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